Ellen Degeneres blog
Ellen’s Birthday Week Highlights!!!
Hello everyone! I know it’s been a while since I last posted and I apologize. Unless of course no one is actually reading my blog, in which case don’t even worry about it.
So the reason I have not posted in over a week is because I was disgustingly sick and had a really hard time using my brain. I am the worst kind of sick person because I don’t like taking medicine (so I don’t), I do not want to rest like I should (so I don’t), and I cough on everything my boyfriend touches.
The only thing that got me through my nasty cold was a good dose of Ellen. And also soup. Also orange juice and TV. Also some great news about having an interview for Carnival Cruises. (And fuzzy socks…)
By the way, just as a side note, I cannot say “orange juice.” It always comes out sounding like “orench shoes.” Which is weird because I can say “orange” by itself and “juice” by itself. I don’t get it…
Anyway, enough about my germs and my problems with word pronunciation. Let’s get back to the good stuff.
Ellen’s birthday week is always a little extra fun and this year was no different. In case you missed any of it you know where to go to catch up, but I’ll put it here to make it a little easier. Although I totally understand if you’re strapped for time so I’m going to share my favorite clips right below so you can get your fix of Ellen magic with the convenience of not having to click another tab in your browser. Enjoy!
P.s. Follow me on twitter for more Ellen and cute animals. (@CotaPaola)
I want nothing more than to be in these people’s shoes. (That, and world peace obviously)
Funny, Blond, And On At 2 O’Clock!!
Hey everyone! Guess what I found!
THIS! I found THIS! It’s a page of people’s favorite Ellen DeGeneres quotes. I thought that if I shared it with all of you, you would add your own. Ellen has so many great quotes that I don’t think I could pick a favorite, but I can tell you ONE of my favorites.
“Attention, youth of the world. I want you to live your lives being exactly who you are. Be true to yourself. The most important thing is to be true to yourself.” –Ellen DeGeneres
That is a recent quote from a couple of days ago, but I have another favorite that is classic Ellen.
“I like my men how I like my coffee. I don’t like coffee.” -Ellen DeGeneres
If you have a favorite Ellen quote you want to share, leave it in the comments below. Or share it on buzzfeed. Now here’s your daily dose of Ellen cheer. Enjoy!
P.S. If you still can’t find the buzzfeed page I’m talking about, click on THIS!
Ellen’s New Show, Favorite Clips Of The Day!!
Hello friends!
How are you all doing? Any new developments? Anything exciting happening? Please tell me about it! I would love to know what is going on in your lives. I would especially like to know because there is nothing going on in my life, so I need a little distraction people.
Speaking of distractions, have you all heard that Ellen has a NEW show on HGTV? It’s like MasterChef only with furniture… I imagine. Or maybe it’s more like Chopped. I’m not sure yet because I haven’t seen it but I will let you know next week.
From what I have seen, the show brings together furniture designers and they compete against each other by designing and building super unique furniture. If I were on that show I would definitely not make it all the way because the only cool shape I can think of is a triangle with a circle inside of it. After the second week they would catch on that all my furniture looks like the deathly hallows and they would have to let me go. Although to be fair there are a lot of people out there who would be interested in deathly hallows furniture so it would be their loss to let me go. Big Harry Potter market out there folks!
Any who, there’s my “what if” scenario of the day. Here are some Ellen laughs to keep you satisfied until tomorrow. Enjoy!
It’s Friday And It’s Funny, Favorite Clips Of The Day!!
Happy Funny Friday everyone!!
I hope you all have exciting plans for this weekend! If you don’t, that’s okay. I hardly ever plan my weekends and they turn out alright. Although, maybe if I did plan my weekends they would turn out better than “alright.” I’m going to think about that and get back to you.
For now, how about everyone just does whatever the heck they want regarding their weekend and we’ll take it from there. While we’re on the subject of weekends, I was thinking about blogging on days that Ellen doesn’t have a show just to keep it going. I would need some new material and I have some ideas, but if anyone wants me to write about something specific feel free to leave a comment or suggestion.
I’ve talked (written) long enough. It’s time for the good stuff. Brace yourselves for a good time, some laughs, and a little bit of embarrassment that isn’t yours. Enjoy!
Let’s Be Good People, Favorite Clip Of The Day!!
Happy happy Tuesday everyone!
I have tasked myself with brining you an inspiring tale of humanitarian work that comes in the form of pizza! Well, technically Ellen brought to us first, but this is just in case you haven’t watched today’s episode.
What if I told you that you could help feed the homeless for one dollar while having a slice of pizza? You would probably say, “That sounds reasonable. Where do I go?” And I would say, “Philadelphia!”
If you don’t live in Philadelphia there’s a good chance you won’t be going to Rosa’s Fresh Pizza anytime soon, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take away from the good being done there. The concept of this local Philadelphia pizzeria is amazing! I don’t want to give away too much because I think watching the clip tells the story much better than I can. All I want to say is that the creativity and heart of this pizzeria can be adopted in so many places and do so much good. If you have a good idea like this one, you should do it. Or at least share it in the comments for others to be inspired. Enjoy!
Ring In The New Year With Some Ellen Show Cheer!! And “Ghostbuster”?
Happy start of the new year everyone!!
I hope you all had fun over the holidays, but it’s time to get back to business. Ellen is back and that means keeping you all informed on what she’s up to on her show. Today Ellen interviewed Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting and she was cool enough to bring Ellen some very honest home videos. Feel free to follow the link to find out just how honest those videos are. Although Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting’s videos were pretty entertaining, what I found more entertaining was the always hilarious Melissa MaCarthy.
I’m not sure if many of you have heard but “Bridesmaids” director Paul Feig has finally confirmed that he is making the new “Ghostbusters” movie starring an all-female cast. How cool is that? And of course Melissa MaCarthy is totally in if they ask her to be in it. Even Bill Murray wants her to be in the cast, as well as Kristen Wiig (another favorite), Linda Cardellini, and Emma Stone! Who wouldn’t want to see that movie? Although I also want to see Tina Fey and Amy Poehler in it. Ugh! So many funny women, I can’t choose just four!
While I make my final decision on my dream cast, take a look at Melissa MaCarthy on Ellen today. Enjoy!
Day 9 Of 12 Days Of Giveaways!!!!!!!!!
You will not believe what I read today about Ellen DeGeneres.
Okay, maybe you will because it’s not that much of a stretch, but still.
There’s a catholic elementary school in Philadelphia that initially sent out invitations for their dance with a picture of Ellen DeGeneres on them. So what’s the problem? The problem is that parents were really upset about it. The apology e-mail sent from the school principal to the parents called Ellen DeGeneres a “poor role model.”
Can you all believe that? They called a person that brings happiness to millions of people through dance, charity, and fun a “poor role model.” I could think of worst people in this world than Ellen DeGeneres.
Point being folks, that this seems like something not worth getting mad over when there are so many other things in our society that are worse than a picture of Ellen DeGeneres dancing on a school invitation. Let’s concentrate on something more important people.
Feel free to follow this fox news link to know more about the situation.
Now how about some wholesome Ellen fun. Enjoy!
You Need To Read This! (Day 8 Of 12 Days Of Giveaways!!!!!!!!)
Can we please talk about those days that really make you feel like a complete and utter LOSER?
What am I saying? Of course we can talk about that because it’s my blog.
I’m sure this has happened to everyone at least once. You’re having the kind of day that just keeps dropping piano after questionably placed piano on top of your head from a twenty story building by people who obviously don’t know how to put a piano into an apartment. That has been my day. I’m just waiting for that last piano key to ding me on the head so I can grow a hilariously large bump and pass out. So I would like to tell you exactly what happened today and then maybe you will get why I am trying to cover up my torment with classic cartoon imagery.
I woke up this morning, like every other unemployed morning. I had a list of things to do, and with that I started my day. I showered, and scrubbed, and brushed, and rinsed, and off I went to do my list.
First on my list was to tend to my car. It was awfully sick and needed some care, so I opened her up and found a nightmare. I topped off the fluid which was easy enough, but changing the light was gonna be tough.
I tried and I tried but no such luck. I cut open two fingers, but still what a punk. It would not budge! It would not move! So I gave up to tend to my wound.
I had no band-aid so paper would do but it wouldn’t stop bleeding. What to do, what to do? Tape would help, and it did, I was glad. So in all reality it wasn’t that bad.
I started my car and it didn’t sound good. I drove it a bit, but then it said I should quit. So then I went to Autozone…
The man at the store told me what was wrong. It will be expensive, no need to prolong.
“I can’t go home for Christmas!” I yelled to the wind.
I should send something home in case I can’t make it. I will rush and I’ll rush to the mailing station (I never said this would be perfect).
When I got there the line was so long and not fun. It seemed like my bad luck was on a run. The man in front of me was coughing and sneezing, while the woman behind could not stop laughing and wheezing.
“Ugh! Why during Christmas? Why on this day?”
I finally made it! They sent off my mail. Now to go home before my car fails.
The bank! I forgot! I need to stop there. I was helped right away with no time to spare.
The lady was nice, she asked about my dog, but then told me that hers was gone.
“Yours looks like mine,” she went on.
“That’s so sad. Why would you tell me something that would make me feel bad?” My dog is back home and if my car is not fixed who knows how much and how long I’ll be missed.
I made it back to my apartment. “I need some Ellen,” I think. So I sit down next to my drink (It was water in case you were wondering).
I should check my e-mail for maybe some news, only to find that again I would lose.
“Thank you for applying,” the email read, “but unfortunately we must move ahead… without you.”
“Dang it! I really wanted that job. I can’t catch a break.”
What will I do? Maybe some Ellen to lighten the mood.
Wait my friend should know about this, I’ll send her a message. Facebook it is! What’s this on my feed? Something interesting I see.
“Which college degrees are worthless?” it asks.
Mine cannot be. But they are, they’re both on that list. Neither degree is of use to me. Don’t you see, don’t you all see? Now what do I need?!
Ellen! Of course, of course that’s it! In my life, that’s what will fit! I have her book here where I sit. This will definitely cheer me a bit!
And what did I find you ask?
Life isn’t that bad. Life is great, life is good! And I would fight this fight if I could.
Wait a minute. I can fight this fight. It’s not that hard. Just be positive and kind and the rest won’t be far. I have other solutions and plans and plans.
Just keep going and fight for what’s deserving.
You want that job? Go get it! You want to save animals in shelters? Go do it! You want to be a Victoria’s Secret model? Good luck with that one cause you’re too short and like nacho cheese too much, but I digress.
So that is my tale, I think I am done. Now I’m deciding to go have more fun.
(End of Christmas Special)
To be honest, I had no idea there was a point to this until the end.
The point is, there are people who have much less than I and frankly much worse. They’re the ones that need the help. So I had a bad day. Who cares? Move on. What’s important to do is help when we can and be nice.
The man at the store tried to put my headlight in for me. He couldn’t do it either, but the point is he tried. He offered without me even asking. He just wanted to help make my day better.
The lady behind me at the post office was trying to make people laugh because she knew we were all irritated. She was just trying to spread some cheer. And the woman at the bank reminded me how much I love my dog and wished me a merry Christmas. None of those people had to do any of that, but they did.
They apparently did what Ellen DeGeneres needed to remind me to do. Just be kind to one another. And now that I think about it, those people made my day a lot better than it could have been. Who knows what could have happened if those people were just plain rude. I hope you all take something from today’s entry and I really hope you can find the good in your day, even if it’s something small.
Here are some videos. Enjoy!
Day 2 Of 12 Days Of Giveaways!!
Who’s ready for another day of GIVEAWAYS!? Please don’t mistake that by thinking I’m giving anything away.
Before I let the videos do the talking, I wanted to talk about how nice those fake present boxes are. I really want to put giant bows on my presents this year but I’m pretty sure I know how it’s going to go down. I’m going to spend an hour or two at Michael’s picking out ribbon, then I’m going to go home and eat something before I start. I’ll turn Netflix on and begin practicing my bows. The first one will look pretty decent so I’ll be over confident about the rest. I’ll continue to make them only to find out that they are getting worse and worse. And right before I give up I’m going to get mad enough to throw all the ribbon to the corner of the room along with a present or two. But who knows, maybe this time it won’t happen 🙂 Well, Enjoy!
Day 1 Of 12 Days Of Giveaways!!!
The infamous 12 DAYS OF GIVEAWAYS is back!!
Besides all the cool stuff Ellen gives away, I really like the way she introduces the giveaways. I also have this weird thing about animal mascots and Ellen has a great one this year. Animal mascots make me laugh absurdly too long. I don’t know what it is about them that make me laugh so much, but it just does for some reason. This year Ellen’s mascot is Dancer the Reindeer and Dancer dances a new dance every day…
Anyway, enough about my strange mascot enjoyment. I won’t spoil it but I will say that Ellen did not disappoint on day one (like she ever would). Also don’t forget that you can enter for a chance to win all those cool gifts at ellentv.com.
I wanted to start with that but I feel I should share what I would not do if I worked for Ellen. I would at least tape my hand to the back of the TV.
Before I let you go, how about you watch one more video that I can’t imagine you won’t like. The woman in this video will give you all the warm feels with her story. It just blows my mind that there are such amazing people in this world. I know sometimes it’s hard to look at the good when there is so much bad being done by people, but I just hope this video will remind you every once in a while that there is good in the world. Enjoy!
On The Road To The Ellen Show 